Expecting too much from a relationship is highly unethical. Believing that a human being can fulfill all your needs and wants is an illusion that has destroyed many friendships and marriages. Each year thousands of couples disconnect emotionally and physically because one is disappointed at what the other is not doing.
We all have needs and wants that will never be fulfilled by one person. Love, money, good health, peace, joy, friendships, family closeness and a sense of inner freedom are too many desires for one person to handle. In fact, some of these needs and wants cannot be fulfilled by people at all. Some may require an intervention of a higher power.
Nevertheless, if you want your relationships to experience longevity you must avoid the error of over expectations at all cost.
What to Do When Your Expectations are too Over Bearing?
A New Attitude
Adopt a new outlook or attitude. Realize that your friend or spouse is only human. When you are aware of an individual’s humanness, you understand that he or she will often let you down in the most difficult times. If you don’t come to this understanding you will live in increased frustration with your partner, resulting in constant disagreements and arguments.
I know of couples who are in conflict every day because they are disappointed with the outcome of their relationship. The wife thought she would never have to work a job to help make ends meet. She expected her husband to be able to take completely care of her while she stayed at home, although they had no children to raise.
The husband thought his wife would give him children. Another thing that angered him is that the sweet little woman he married had grown seriously critical of him.
These unmet expectations grew into an ongoing conflict between them, destroying the pleasure of intimacy and suppressing the joy and happiness that all marriages should experience.
Accept Personal Responsibility
Another you must do to save your marriage is to take responsibility for your own life. Pursue your own dreams and set your own goals. Without personal goals of your own, you will have little value to offer in a relationship. Being always dependent on your spouse is a mistake. If you do this, you will become a boring person while your spouse will continue to grow in strength and character.
If you do this, you will become a boring person while your spouse will continue to grow in strength and character.
Many marriages are dissolved because one spouse simply outgrows the other. This will likely be the result if you continue to place unreasonable expectations on the one you love.
Adapting a Gratitude Mentality
Adopt the grateful mentality. When you married your spouse, you pledged to be there for one another through negative and positive situations of life. So be thankful for the good things which your spouse is contributing to the marriage. Don’t ignore the things you should be grateful for. Express thankfulness and grow from there.
Constant complaint is none other than succumbing to a victim mentality. But together both of you can get past the most darkness moments in life and overcome them. These are the tests that great relationships are made of.