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A Mind for Winners


How to Turn Your Uneventful Marriage from Blah to Fantastic


After marriage then what? Out of the Tens of thousands of marriages occurring each year, only a small percentage are able to maintain the pre-marriage bliss on a continual basis. The thrill of having the other person in our lives begins to decline after the first few years or so, if not sooner.

Over the years our marriage is reduced to a number of boring routines. We go through the motions to please one another, yet our heart is not really there. We would rather be doing something else or spending time with someone more interesting. We endure our spouses out of responsibility, pity or convenience.
The sky rocking divorce rate is a testimony to this. But it doesn’t have to be this way.
The pleasure of building a strong and an increasingly blissful marriage is possible if a couple is willing to explore different dimensions of each other. Every person on earth has various dimensions of personality and character which, unfortunately, never comes to reality due to the unwillingness to go through the challenges that marriages need to grow and develop.


Newly Married Couple

Sustaining a blissful marriage after marriage demands that we fill our lives with positive sounds, activities, places and people that will help keep our union in a blissful state. Hanging around negative people, hearing negative things and complaining about what we don’t have are bliss killers and marriage destroyers.

10 Exceptional Routines for Sustaining Bliss in our Marriage

Surround Yourselves with Positive Music and Song

Positive music and song takes our heart to faraway places and fills our mind with imagination. Beautiful sounds help us forget about the ups and downs of life, empowers us with a refreshed spirit. Couples whose life is filled with music experience greater bonding and intimacy. Dedicating songs to one another at least once or twice a week will do wonders in keeping the bliss alive.

Become Interested in Travel and Geography

Loving to travel and experience different geography is another way to lose ourselves in different worlds. All couples experience times when it is necessary to leave it all, journey away from everything familiar and experience new places, sights, and sounds. But the activity of travel doesn’t have to take you to faraway, exotic places. Travel can mean cruising over to the East side of town or going to visit the museum on the West Side of town, simply going to the small town or city next door to participate in a festival.

What about Geography?

Geography could mean journaling to the lakefront, sitting on a rock on a sunny day and watching the sailboats pass by. It could mean going to a national park in your city or state and hiking or riding a bike along the many trails that are available.

Keep an Optimistic State of Mind

The act of complaining will kill the thrill out of a marriage from day one. The negatives will always challenge a marriage. This is life. But continue ranting is not the answer. I know of couples whose marriage have been ruin due to the negative energy that comes out of blaming circumstances on the other half or on someone else. Keeping an optimistic mind says that whatever heaven in the marriage, we can work it out.

The optimistic mind is a creative mind. It is a mind full of confidence of overcoming anything that might violate the marriage rights. Couples should try signing the “We shall overcome song together, “whenever a negative situation threatens to generate into complaints. They will be surprised how strengthening this conviction could be.

Maintain a Winning Mentality

If marriage couples would maintain a winning mentality there would be very few divorces in America. Negative circumstances that might attempt to derail the marriage would be doom to failure from the get go. Couples with a winning mentality would be determined not to be overcome by challenges in the home, the workplace or the community of people who surround them. Conversations of complaint would be replaced by affirmations of victory and success.
Couples with a winning mentality will constantly reveal new levels of personality and character, simply because they will always be involved in experiencing new things and achieving success in new areas of life. Marriages become boring when there is little or no winning mentality to inspire newness.

Build a Circle of Positive Friends

Every marriage needs the positive energy of other people. Don’t have a just you and I attitude toward life. Even if a couple has kids, good friendships will add more spice and variety to the relationship. Positive friends will do everything in their power inspire and empower the marriage toward blissfulness. When conflicts arise between two couples, positive friends encourage communication and reconciliation. Stay away from friends who side with one side or the other. These people appear to want to see a split or divorce between to happily marriage couples.
Usually, such people are complainers, single or physical or emotionally divorced themselves and would like to see you join the misery.


Build a Supportive Family Unit

Having a supportive family goes a long way in keeping a marriage blissful. In any marriage, it would do both couples a ton of good if there were supportive family members on both sides of the Isle. A strong family full of positive people will be a pillar of support when challenges stand in the path of a couple’s progress.

Supportive family members will always be there to help with whatever needs that may come about, including financial factors, daycare or encouragement if situations become overwhelming. Usually strong parents have already gone through some of the struggles the couples may be experiencing.

Warning: personal experience reminds us that not all family members have our best interest in mind. Some in-laws are always attempting to pull the union apart. Jealous mothers, sisters, controlling brothers and fathers or disrespected nieces and nephews are the elements that can tear a marriage apart and leave a ton of bitterness behind. Avoid the input of such family members and identify and choose those who are supportive of the marriage, regardless of how few there may be.

Pledge to Immediately Resolve Conflicts

The willing to resolve conflict within a marriage before it gains a foothold within our hearts is the hallmark of an intelligent marriage. In order to do this, we must be sensitive to each other’s needs and desires. For example, if there is something that we sense needs to be done to please the other, we must not hesitate to do it.

Conflict within marriage, if allowed to grow diminishes the bliss that our hearts hold for the other person. In fact, there is a biblical scripture which states,” Let not the sun go down on your anger” toward one another. There is something about an embedded conflict that gradually robs of our hearts of the joy and intimacy we have for our spouses.
Therefore, for the sake of keeping the thrill alive, we must pledge to resolve conflict whenever it arises within our marriage.

Keep a Commitment to Love

Without a commitment to love the other person for life, the marriage is already in jeopardy. When there is always a threat of divorce or a chance that the other might leave because of negative conditions and circumstances, the marriage will always be at the mercy of uncertainty and one partner will always be attempting to please the other at the loss of his or her own freedom.


A Commitment to love one another regardless of the limiting factor that might challenge the relationship will provide assurance that both of you are going to overcome the situation together. A meaningful commitment such as this shows how much the marriage is valued as a sacred union in the sight of God. Complaints are low.

Positive communication is high. Otherwise, the marriage may have been built off of convenience, personal pride or desperation. The commitment to love, which goes beyond feelings of infatuation, is the hallmark of a blissful marriage.

Protest Injustice in Your Community

Life must go beyond the mere concentration on marriage. In fact, a marriage can become more enriched if the couple pursues of cause beyond themselves. Getting our minds off ourselves and placing our focus on the plight of others gives our marriage a new dimension of growth and freshness. We further discover qualities within each other that we didn’t know existed. We become new again.

The sparkle in many of our marriages declines because there is no vision beyond the relationship we have with our significant other. Therefore, we must reach out to a world that needs a concerned voice or a helping hand to bring peace and stability to humanity.

Embrace the Spiritual and Sacred

Maintaining bliss within our marriage requires that we understand that there is no other bliss given than God the creator. Therefore, in order to sustain the bliss in our marriage, we must pledge our allegiance to God who created marriage.

Couples should pray and meditate together along with studying the sacred scriptures for daily empowerment. Couples who attend church and express gratitude for the blessing in which God has bestowed upon them sustains a peace and joy that accelerates the growth and bonding within their marriage.

Sustaining a blissful marriage must be earned. The above rituals and routines must be taken seriously and practiced on a weekly basis, if not daily. But the investment is well worth the while. Be careful. The pressures of the daily grind can make it seem impossible to carry out these principles on a consistent basis. However, don’t believe it.

As a blissful couple, both of you must schedule time so that nothing threatening comes between the marriage and its divine function. Sacrifices and compromises on the behalf of the other result in win-win combination for both parties involve.



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