On a non-supernatural level, death affects us all, leading to a web of painful thoughts mixed with great memories which will last forever. But at the end of the day, death is inevitable. We must all prepare for it in one way or another. However, thousands of people are unprepared for their departure.
Blessing or Curse
When people die, they leave something behind. That something could be a blessing or curse( peace or chaos) to the people they love. The most negative things we leave behind when we are not prepared are financial burdens, family disputes, grief, and shock.
However, when we die with dignity the most important thing that we should leave behind is a resolution of peace. No one should have to worry or fight about anything on our behalf.
Leaving behind financial burdens can be a big headache for grieving family and friends. Many times when a family member dies, he or she may owe thousands of dollars that must be paid by the surviving spouse or by the parents. This problem occurs because of a disregard for our loved ones.
Another example is when a person commits suicide because of a chronic upheaval in his or her life. That person has actually left a curse behind since insurance companies don’t distribute money for such incidents. So instead of giving their love one a peaceful burial, a mother or father or spouse might have to beg for or borrow money from others to make up the cost of a funeral.
Most family disputes happen because the deceased person has not made it clear who makes the decisions on her behalf when she is gone. Disputes can occur a number of things, burial site, property, money, type of funeral, type of casket, the decision between burial or cremation, the time, and place of the funeral, the officiating staff etc.
These challenges can have a long lasting negative effect on the solidarity of a family if allowed to get out of hand. Family members have gone away from funerals hating one another for years because of the pressure of resolving such challenges.
An Unwritten Will
Every person needs to leave a written will that can be located after the person’s departure. Leaving a will (type of peace resolution) can avoid so many troubles. When everyone knows who get a certain amount of money or number of possessions, the family members can be at peace and concentrate on sending their loved one off with respect and dignity.
A will should be written and passed to the head of every family member so that each one will know what to expect. This should be done way ahead of a loved one’s suspected departure in order to prevent confusion and misunderstanding among doubting family members.
Unfair Shock and Grief
There is no shock or grief greater than a suicide of a loved one. Choosing this method of death is pure selfishness. It leaves everyone unprepared, especially the mother, father, spouse, and children. It is unfair to others who may have experienced the hard knocks of life and have survived through it. It is unfair to parents because it leaves them with the guilt that they could have done something more. It is unfair to the spouse because it leaves him or her with a sense of having failed the relationship.
These are emotions that can torment a person’s life forever. Suicide is not the answer to anyone’s final end. Thank of others who have gone through more horrific tragedies and survived. The bottom line is that loved ones should be prepared for your final exit.
Gratitude and Love
If possible, a family member who is nearing his or her final departure should express the gratitude and love she has enjoyed with her loved ones. Such demonstration will better prepare their loved ones for the expectation of death. When family member see that you are not feeling sorrow for yourself, this puts them at ease.
I once know a woman, for example, who worked all the way up to a week before her death. Her doctor had told her she had only two weeks to live before cancer would take her life. Instead of lying in bed and waiting to die, she worked, cooked, and socialized as if nothing was wrong. Her funeral was a testimony to her grace and courage and an inspiration to all who attended her funeral.
An Abiding Presence
Leaving behind a legacy of peace is the proper way of making a final exit. Preparing for death with dignity doesn’t have to be sad and dreary. Many believe death is just a journey to the other side without the body. Countless family members can feel the presence of their departed loved one watching over them and warning them of dangers lurking in their life and affairs. The knowledge that death is just a crossover to another dimension is to be prepared for its arrival.