A good marriage should be a journey in which new and exciting moments, activities and milestones occur on a constant basis. However, repetitive routines can destroy the vibrancy and bliss that should be an indication of an outstanding marriage.
A routine can be any activity repeated until the point of indifference. In other words, you and your spouse are just going through the motions. For instance, the thrill of going to a restaurant for Friday date night has steadily declined. Your both bored. Doing the same activities repeatedly every weekend can become quite monotonous, resulting in a gradual disappearance of what makes a relationship new and exciting: intimacy, appreciation, and love.
Sadly, many couples go into marriage believing that the honeymoon can sustain itself many years beyond the sacred union. They believe in fairy tale marriages in which a couple is guaranteed to live happily ever after.
Bored with Sameness
But it is human nature to long for something new after we have become too familiar with a person, place or thing. The temptation is always to look at the greener grass on the other side. However, you only need to look deeper into the one you love to find a greener pasture.
Wisdom of Renewing the Union
Although marriage is a wonderful gift between two people, the union must be renewed time after time. Wise couples know this. In other words, after the initiation honeymoon, the newness and excitement of a marriage must be sustained via constant renewal.
In each one of us, there lies layer upon layer of discovery. We don’t know each other to the fullest and we never do. We just stop being creative in marriage and allow routines to define us. A blissful marriage should be an endless revelation of character and personality.
But don’t be disappointed if your marriage is moving toward indifference. Thousands of couples live in an illusion of happiness, but their marriage is heading down a dead-end road. However, you can get your marriage back on the path of discovery if you change old habits and routines that are no longer providing life and vibrancy to the marriage.
Three Things to Avoid in Marriage
Don’t allow your marriage to fall into the trap of sameness. Even though struggles will come and go, make sure that the pursuit of newness become a lifestyle for both of you. Sameness leads to taking each other for granted.
In the lives of millions of couples, sameness is a lifestyle. They believe they know each other so well that there is just isn’t anything else to know. However, this is a mistake. Decide to break the sameness. Do something new and unexpected and watch the transformation.
Avoid Ignoring Each Other
Boring marriage routines can lead to ignoring the little things that one should do in a marriage, such as giving sincere attention and time to genuine listening and conversations regarding the state of the marriage.
When we stop deeply listening and communicating with one another in marriage, our sense of connection and intimacy gradually fade away.
Avoid the heart of Indifference
Indifference is when you just don’t care about what happens in the marriage. You just live together day after day, come what may. This type of existence isn’t good for couples if the marriage is to survive and go to the next level.
When indifference has taken its course in a marriage, separation and divorce are knocking at a door and is about to burst inside.
Three Things to Keep Doing in a Marriage
Be Creative in Marriage
Nothing is more blissful then the creative marriage. Couples who find time to do new and exciting things for one another will never grow apart. The union will steadily increase in intimacy and inseparable love.
No person is one dimensional. There is so much more about the person you married, it will take a life time to get to truly know them. Because the spirit in a person is limitless, the potential for growth and development in each person is unending.
Living a creative marriage means that you desire to see the best in your spouse for as long as he or she lives on this earth. So be creative! Do things together that both of you would be proud of and never thought possible. You are guaranteed an exciting union.
The best marriages make creativity a lifestyle.
Show Sincere Appreciation
Nothing will make your spouse feel more special than expressing sincere appreciation for common things such as making you breakfast, cleaning the house, taking out the trash, and washing the dishes when it was your turn.
Compliment it other several times a week. Don’t pass by one another with touching in some aspect: a hug, a touch on the back, hand or shoulder. A kiss on the cheek. These are the little things that keep indifference and boring routine at bay.
Showing sincere appreciation is an activity which sustains powerful marriages.
Be Very Communicative
The state of your marriage must be observed daily. You must share and communicate how to improve weak areas in the marriage and how to eliminate conditions which threaten to disrupt the relationship. Don’t let people, including in-laws, interfere in your lives and affairs.
To reassure each other of your love and commitment you must never get to the point of threatening one another with the possibility of divorce. Great marriages never reach such desolate point.
The act of listening and communicating will hinder the temptation to fall into indifference if disagreements occur. Quickly resolving a situation by coming to an understanding and forgiving one another is the key to keeping a strong marriage bond.
Marriage life can stay new and exciting, but not without a sincere commitment to earn the marriage every day. Avoid lifeless habits and routines. Choose to make your marriage a journey of discovery and fun adventure. Prove them wrong which says marriage is the end of freedom. A creative marriage is a freedom.